Ye Olde Scribe Presents: A Beery Good Solution to Poverty

YOS has pondered poverty for most of his life. What to do. What to do. All those welfare queens in their limos that crowd our streets picking up their food stamps for doing nothing. You’ve seen them, right? Why one of those welfare queens almost ran over Scribe yesterday on the way to get his welfare check. DAMN YOU ELTON JOHN! Well, that’s what the vanity plate said.

Those ^%$#@ pansy Liberals won’t let us carve the poor up and serve them for Thanksgiving.

What to do. What to do.

Making beer is cheap.

Well, making GOOD beer isn’t. But these are folks already think Miller really offers a high life, Bud is “King of Beers.” Why not put them in The Pour House. No, not “The Poor House.” We tried that. And once again the ^%$#@ Pinko Commie Socialists objected. No, “Pour House.” Extract breweries with housing for them. They work off their meals and beer by brewing. This provides cheap product for the masses who have yet to grace the doors of the Pour House, and provide part of their subsistence.

“What? Compete with the major breweries?” Hell NO. These will be run by the major breweries. Cheap labor. “Unfair for the craft beer industry?” Maybe not. Ignorant twits usually don’t drink craft beer. And most of the un-beer-ducated masses already have a drinking problem. Add in unrestricted co-ed dorms and… Hey! It’s like a perpetual motion machine!

Or we could just treat them like human beings.