Ye Olde Scribe’s One of the WORST Beers in the World Award: Michelob Ultra

No pictures provided because the brewer doesn't deserve the promotion for barfing out this one!
No pictures provided because the brewer doesn’t deserve the promotion for barfing out this one!

Scribe understands why low carb is important. REALLY UNDERSTANDS. But couldn’t they find a flavor to pack into this? Looks: if Scribe went to the Doc and a urine sample looking like this was taken the doc would be concerned. Almost nothing to it. Ah, clarity isn’t everything.

Get it in your mouth and, “Eh? What’s wrong with your water here, bartender?” Yup less substantial than some H20 and annoying as hell.

Taste? ARE YOU KIDDING?????????????????????????????????????????????????

Not much about not much. except water is probably a better choice.

Once upon a road trip Scribe visited a friend in Tennessee. You know him: writes for this site. Living near the Cumberland River and having just been jogging Scribe took a drink and immediately spit it out.

Better than Ultra.
PGASCRsucks

Power to the People

pgahistoryIn a funny sort of way, homebrewing has come full circle. Thirty-four years ago, our country’s 39th President, Jimmy Carter, signed H.R. 1337 which effectively legalized homebrewing nationwide. And now, shortly after another presidential election, our 44th President, Barack Obama, has released to the public his recipe for the first beer ever brewed on the White House grounds. The fact that this presidential beer—a honey ale—was made with honey gathered from the White House’s own hives is emblematic of what homebrewing has become today, a craft, like cooking (or beekeeping), that empowers people to do for themselves and rely less on packaged, processed, mass-produced food and beverages.

Were it not for Prohibition early in the 20th century, homebrewing may well have been the kind of basic home skill passed on from generation to generation like baking, pickling or hunting. But as we know, that dark period for imbibers had a lasting hangover that affected both the making and consumption of alcoholic beverages for decades. The craft beer revolution, which not coincidentally was kick-started by Carter’s pro-homebrewing legislation, put the artisanal craft of making beer back into the peoples’ hands (basically the definition of craft beer) and opened adventurous beer drinkers’ eyes to the flavor possibilities out there in the many different styles of beer that were increasingly becoming available.

Back in 1980 there were only eight craft breweries in the U.S., but after three decades of strong, steady growth, there are more than 2,000. While macrobrew sales are flat, craft beer continues to grow, even in a terrible economy. The rise in popularity of homebrewing has not only mirrored this growth, it has been further invigorated by the do-it-yourself, locavore foodie movement where people have discovered the satisfaction and challenge of making things from scratch. We don’t know if Martha Stewart has ever homebrewed, but it’s the kind of skill she’d surely approve of. If we can make bread from scratch, how much different or more difficult is it to brew our own beer?

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Minneapolis’ Target Field Debuts Self-Serve Beer Station

beernewspgaMINNEAPOLIS – The Minnesota Twins say Target Field is the first major league ball park to serve beer from a vending machine.

The self-serve beer station debuted Sunday during the game against the New York Yankees. A second station is expected to be added in time for the All-Star Game next week.

To buy a brew from the vending machine, buyers prove their age at a concession stand and purchase a vending card. That card is used at the vending machine where buyers can tap up to 48 ounces every 15 minutes. The machine offers four beers: Bud, Bud Light, Shock Top Lemon Shandy and Goose Island 312 Urban Pale Ale.

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Beer Profile: Collective Distortion IPA by Stone

Profiled by Ken Carman for PGA

pgaprofilecollab-distort-bttle22Foggy, redish, hazy. Some remaining big bubble head but this bottle was leftopen for a while, so I’d never count that against the presentation. Only slight light shines through like a murky ruby.
Carmel malt nose with grapefruit like hops. Great balance. No coriander or elderberry in the nose.

Taste is a great balance of slight coriander, slight elderberry all balanced out with a firm hop, again grapefruity and taste a bit rind of…. But mostly the flesh.

The mouthfeel is firm with slight pepper from coriander and slightly slick caramel. Carbonation very slight to none, but this sample is old. Did I mention I opened it and forgot about it for a while? I was amazed there was any carbonation.

The malt, which is caramel and pale but quite complex melts into the grapefruit hops and the spices perfectly. I would think maybe a hint of Maris Otter, hint of Munich: with this it’s tough because it blends so well together, a masterpiece.

They call this a “collective brew,” but Stone’s site, nor RB and BA mentionhow the two musicians helped. Or was it named after them? “Collective” indicates more than that. Here’s what Stone says about it…

In bringing together artisans from disparate aural planes, one might expect an offbeat, feedback-warped cacophony, shrill to the point of unlistenable. Yet, by inviting Kyle Hollingsworth, keyboardist for eclectic, jam-prone sextet, The String Cheese Incident, and Keri Kelli, wailing rock guitarist of Alice Cooper fame, we were able to make truly beautiful music. Turns out, these musicians have a great deal in common, both with each other and with Stone. We all enjoy turning things up to 11, and that is represented in this collaborative offering, an imperial India pale ale ably backed by Nugget, Comet and Calypso hops, and amplified care of a healthy dry-hopping with Vic’s Secret, a new Australian hop, adding citrus and tropical fruit oomph. To give this modern masterpiece some soulful, classic character, we traced the roots of brewing to the days when Old World herbs were used to spice beers, adding in coriander and, a first for us, elderberries. To stand up to that sumptuous spice and blaring bitterness, we added golden naked oats, which are lightly roasted and add body and enhanced mouthfeel to the brew like a steady, unbreakable backbeat to an incendiary jam solo. Sit back, crank the volume and get lost in this operatic incarnation of genres combined in the name of invention.

88 at Beer Advocate,with no rating by the site owners, 95 overall at Rate Beer, 75 for style. Not quite sure how one can rate “style” that strictly when it’s obvious a Specialty based off an Imperial IPA.

Looks like it may have been introduced at The Maui Brewers Festival.Once again: a bit vague in the promos I read.

4.5

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Welcome to the PGA beer rating system: one beer “Don’t bother.” Two: Eh, if someone gives it to you, drink. Three: very good, go ahead and seek it out, but be aware there is at least one problem. Four: seek it out. Five: pretty much “perfecto.”

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____________________________________________Beer HERE

FredricmartianKen Carman was raised by wild yeast on the fermentation plains of Moosesylvania. There is no truth to him having grown up near NYC, but not so secretly longing to live in the Adirondacks. Or that he did. Or that he moved to Tennessee. Or that when he retires he’ll move back. Or that he started brewing in 79cause most of the selections sucked. Or that he’s a BJCP judge, a columnist. it’s all lies. Right now he’s still thinking it’s all true as he sucks down Miller in the Matrix, but dreams of more complicated quaffs.

Brew Biz: Werts and All

Strange woman hangs out in front of Tennessee Brew Works asking for a free beer, Nah, , it’s my wife Millie!
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By Ken Carman

  Ken Carman is a BJCP judge; homebrewer since 1979, club member at Escambia Bay, Clarksville Carboys and Music City Homebrewers, who has been interviewing professional brewers all over the east coast for over 15 years.



TBW
809 Ewing Ave
Nashville, TN 37203
(615) 200-8786


  Just telling some folks how Garr brews might make someone who teaches others how to homebrew cringe and a traditional German brewer go, “Gelsobin die augamanchkin haufen mist!”
 OK, I made up some of those words except the last, which I was told by my German teacher in my first high
school meant “hay,” but also a not so polite way to say there’s something disgusting in the hay. As to the rest, why would I make up… words? Just lazy I guess, and no need in offending those who, like I, mostly remember just the curse words.

DSCN0603Part of the great planning at Tennessee Brew Works would be an upper level, eagle nest-like, perch that includes a second bar, where patrons can watch the brewery from up high.

 Let me start by saying that all the thought, the planning and inventiveness that went into making the dream that became Tennessee Brew Works come true, is beyond impressive. Garr Schwartz and Christian Spears did their homework and beyond.
  Garr was raised in Donelson, Tennessee, but he lived in New York City area for a while and worked on Wall Street: Lehman. Yup, that “Lehman.” This is what he went to college for: business and finance. He was selling hedge funds, investments.

  Not the most exciting business to be in these days. It’s contracting. And the skill set I had was not appreciated.”

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  What’s so unusual about how Garr brews? Well to mention just two; severely crushed grains: pulverized applies, I would think, and a filter system that essentially does what us homebrewers are told not to do… squeeze grain hard. Similar to squeezing grain bags, sort of, only more high tech. Oh, here’s another example: sparge at very hot temperatures. Continue reading “Brew Biz: Werts and All”

Beer Profile: Heater Allen Rauch Dunkel

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Profiled by Maria Devan for PGA

pgaprofilePours a hazy honey brown with a khaki colored head that falls quickly but not entirely. Leaves some wet sheets of lace to slide down the glass as you drink a few spots too. Has a beautiful orangey/reddish hue when held to the light. Nose is rich and malty. bread crusts. Slightly sweet, toasty and a bit of smoke. really not that much smoke. A slight whiff of noble hops and a bit of caramel round out the nose.

Flavor is delicate. Mouthfeel is very thin. Crusty bread, a caramel that is deep but not heavy 10371939_1546777268883281_4862409133099732933_nor excessive. The smoke adds only a faint hint of meat or even smoke and a just a bit of earthy char to the drink. A slight hop bitter finishes this one dry with the dry malt and a faint caramel sweetness. Clean, light and a bit of earth at the very end. Moderate carbonation.

Of the three beers I was able to try from this brewery I liked this one the least. The mouthfeel was so very thin. I felt like the smoke character was trying very hard to be “not disagreeable” or even smoky.

2.5

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Welcome to the PGA beer rating system: one beer “Don’t bother.” Two: Eh, if someone gives it to you, drink. Three: very good, go ahead and seek it out, but be aware there is at least one problem. Four: seek it out. Five: pretty much “perfecto.”

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__________________Beer HERE

meMaria Devan lives in Ithaca, NY and is frequent reviewer of beer and a beer lover deluxe.

Beer Reviews by Tom Becham

roguedonut
Image courtesy brewerianimelogs.wordpress.com

Rogue Voodoo Doughnut Pretzel, Raspberry and Chocolate Ale

For me, Rogue is one of those breweries that I never know about. They do some very nice brews. They also do some wild experiments and come up with some dreadful disasters. I would say that in a sense, they are a lesser version of Dogfish Head. Dogfish Head does wild experimentation, and are hit and miss. But Dogfish Head tends to have a decent success rate, and even their failures tend not to be completely hideous. Not so for Rogue.

Especially the previous editions of their Voodoo Doughnut Ales. Packaged in garish pink 750 ml bottles, until now, I had regarded the Voodoo Doughnut series (named after an iconic bakery in Portland, Oregon, and patterned after the flavors of their most popular baked goods) as purely gimmick beers.

The Bacon Maple Ale was a true abomination, tasting basically like a sweetened bottle of Liquid Smoke (trust me, it’s not as good as it sounds).

And the Chocolate, Peanut Butter and Banana Ale tasted like none of those things, and was just a mediocre beer on its own merits, regardless of the supposed flavorings.

So, I approached their Pretzel, Raspberry and Chocolate Ale with more than a little trepidation.

Thankfully, Rogue hit the nail on the head this time.

This beer pours a lovely reddish-copper. A short-lived, caramel-colored, fizzy head brings some liveliness.

The aroma of Pretzel, Raspberry and Chocolate (PBC from here on) contains caramel and chocolate malts, and pungent hints of raspberry. Not sure if it’s real fruit or extract. If real fruit, I think it’s likely to also contain juice.

It is on the palate where this beer really scores major points. The first flavor is massive bready malt, akin to what one would expect in the best of German bocks.

Following this are brief glimpses of the raspberry. The fruit does not overpower or oversweeten, but its presence is readily identifiable.

On the finish is the distinctive flavor of chocolate malt (boosted by actual chocolate? Likely not.), providing a bittersweet baking chocolate impression.

All in all, Rogue has redeemed themselves and their Voodoo Doughnut series with this one. This is not just a novelty beer. Definitely try this one if you have the opportunity.

TomBThat’s Tom Becham. Right over there. To your left. WHAT, you DON’T recognize him? He lives in Oxnard, CA and he’s a famous beer writer.

New Beer Grotto Lets Customers “Try Before You Buy”

glasses-of-beer

beer-news10DEXTER (WWJ) – Craft beer is a big business in Michigan, but how do you figure out which one suits your taste? A new business opening in Dexter hopes to put an end to the mystery.

Michigan is the number five craft brewing state in the country, with more than 180 microbreweries and brew pubs, but many people have never even tasted a local brew.

“People are afraid to try new things simply because of the price of a six-pack at a grocery store or at a convenience store,” Lisa Mano, manager of the Beer Grotto, told WWJ’s Marie Osborne.

Mano said most people go to the store and see a display of craft beer, but have no idea where to begin.

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Dogfish Inn

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As a follow up on our post from a few weeks ago about Dogfish Head founder Sam Calagione’s voyage on the high seas this summer, we have some hot news to share about the new inn the brewery is launching in Lewes, DE near its Milton headquarters.

Doors open to the Dogfish Inn July 4th weekend, but the reservation line will begin booking rooms sooner. Calls will be accepted starting Friday, June 27.

The 16-room inn extends style and convenience consistent with the standards today’s travelers expect, while celebrating a bygone era of family vacations, big cars and endless summers. Naturally, rooms are appointed with beer-centric amenities and design elements. Each one is outfitted with a wool Dogfish blanket created in collaboration with the iconic American apparel maker Woolrich, a Tivoli radio and screenprints of beer labels from Dogfish Head’s music collaborations. Delaware artist Steve Rogers created a treasure hunt throughout the motel by painting the historic Lightship Overfalls somewhere in each room. A National Historic Landmark and one of only 17 lightships remaining, the real Lightship Overfalls is docked just a few hundred feet away.

Mini-fridges in rooms come stocked with locally made snacks, and there’s barware to enjoy the beers guests bring back from the Dogfish brewery and brewpub. Retro American-made beach chairs and Apolis tote bags are ready for trips to the local beaches. A library in The Cottage was curated by the renowned City Lights Bookstore in San Francisco. Guests can borrow or buy a beach read or a heavy hitter. The patio features the Cowboy Cauldron where friends and families can gather ‘round a fire and count shooting stars.

To help guests get the most out their stay at the Dogfish Inn, the team there has put together a map highlighting local landmarks. With a kayak launch, nearby Junction and Breakwater Trail and the Cape Henlopen State Park all in close proximity, the inn serves as a springboard to dive deep into the beauty of coastal Delaware by bike, by hike, by paddleboard or kayak.

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